Preparing for a violent incident

  • When with the abuser, try to keep away from rooms containing dangerous objects, such as the kitchen, or the bathroom.
  • Identify rooms with an exit. Know which doors, windows, elevators or stairs to use.
  • Keep a packed bag with a friend, a relative or a neighbor. Be sure to include copies of important documents.
  • Tell one or more neighbors about the violence and ask them to call the police if they see or hear a disturbance.
  • Create a code word to use with your children, family, friends and neighbors when you need the police.
  • Have a plan! Know where you will go if you decide to leave your home.

Preparing to leave

  • Get your own post office box.
  • Open a checking/savings account in your name.
  • Leave money, an extra set of keys, copies of important documents, extra clothes and/or medicine in a safe place or with someone you trust.
  • Identify a friend or relative willing to provide a safe place for you and your children to stay or who can lend you money.
  • Always keep with you important numbers and some change or a calling card for emergency phone calls.
  • If you have pets, make arrangements for them to be cared for in a safe place.

Safety with a Protective Order

  • Always keep a copy of your protective order with you, including in your car, at work, at home and with close relatives.
  • Inform family members, friends, and neighbors that you have a protective order in effect.
    Call the police if your abuser violates the protective order.
  • Always have a backup plan you can use while waiting on the police to respond.
  • Always ask for police report numbers after calling the police.

Safety in your day to day life

  • Keep all windows and doors locked.
  • Develop a safety plan with your children.
  • Inform your child(ren)'s school, day care, or anyone who cares for your children what individuals have permission to pick up your children.
  • Inform neighbors if your abuser no longer lives with you and ask them to call the police if they see the abuser.
  • Request to have your telephone number unlisted/unpublished.
  • Never call the abuser from your home or tell him where you live.

Safety on the job & in public

  • Have someone with you at all times.
  • Use a variety of routes to and from home each day.
  • At work, inform management, a co-worker and security of your situation and if possible provide them with a picture of your abuser.